A gritty feminist fighter film, or boring Disney filler?
Director: Le-Van Kiet
Starring: Joey King, Dominic Cooper, Olga Kurylenko
Running time: 94 minutes
It is a well-established truth in fairytale lore that a woman’s place is in bed. Sleepy little things aren’t they, princesses? Never put it past them to fall into a magical coma at any given moment, and never put it past the prince to sweep them gallantly into a new bed. Consent? That’s for poor people.
It wasn’t much of a surprise then, when The Princess opened up with precisely the same concept. Sprawled delicately across her satin bedsheets, our eponymous heroine (Joey King) wakes in a wedding dress and handcuffs. Now, the average Disney princess may panic here, but – as the film so desperately wants you to know – this princess is anything but average. Faced with an unwanted marriage to her sociopathic suitor (Dominic Cooper), our protagonist will do whatever it takes to survive – and, in this case, that means a whole lot of martial arts. Taking down men three times her size with the mere flourish of a hairpin, the Princess – who is given no other name throughout – battles her way courageously through the castle halls. The kingdom is under siege by her suitor. Her family is locked in a cell below ground. She is the only hope left.
Okay. First things first: the fight scenes are spellbinding. The action choreography is masterful and well-filmed, and the stunts performed are both convincing and original. Haunting the halls in her bloodied wedding dress (think Stephen King’s Carrie, with swords), the Princess manages to swing through fight scenes without the over-sexualisation of usual female heroes. Seriously – have you watched an action film recently? The men need full plates of armour and yet the women are fighting in glorified metal bras and pants (tell me now who’s the ‘weaker’ sex). That, however, is the only real compliment I can muster. Amidst a boneless plot and frankly cheesy writing, the film offers nothing that hasn’t already been done. Numbingly predictable and smattered with poorly executed visual effects, the plot has all the depth and intrigue of a GCSE drama performance, and a bad one at that.
It’s important to note that the actors are at no fault for this film’s mediocrity. While I certainly wouldn’t recommend anyone for an Oscar nomination, King’s performance was captivating, despite the predictability of the script, and Cooper would have played a brilliant villain, had his character not been so one-dimensional and cartoonish. The Princess, when provided with a compelling plot and nuanced characters, might just have the bones of a promising feature film. Unfortunately, as it stands, the action sequences are the weak heartbeat of an otherwise lifeless corpse.
For a film centred around feminism, it’s glaringly obvious that this feature was created almost entirely by men
I wanted to like this film. I really did. King’s progression from The Kissing Booth to a gritty feminist fighter film was a fascinating move, and one that I was more than eager to watch. I’ll admit it. The idea of a young woman brutalising entire gangs of misogynists enticed me. The end result, however, was a passable watch at best.
Instead of presenting a fully fleshed-out protagonist, we’re met instead by a character so one-dimensional that she’d disappear if she turned sideways. King is used entirely as a vessel for this forced narrative on female heroism, leaving her ironically less nuanced than the princess tropes she’s built to criticise. Apart from some clumsy flashbacks and overdone training montages, we know so little about this character that it’s hard to really care. It may come as a surprise to the average Hollywood script writer, but squeezing a female lead into a warrior get-up and feeding her action lines doesn’t make a film empowering to women. It doesn’t make it entertaining, either.
Strangely, for a film centred around feminism, it’s glaringly obvious that this feature was created almost entirely by men. As always, the access to a good liquid liner in these medieval landscapes is truly astonishing. I half expected her to fight her way past a Superdrug and nip in to top her foundation up. After nearly drowning twice throughout the film, the real hero is that waterproof mascara she’s wearing. (Seriously, it doesn’t budge an inch). It wouldn’t surprise me if most men truly believe women wake up looking like this, but real life isn’t a tampon advert. Trust me – I'm as upset as you are.
After taking down half the male population with the flick of her sword, our protagonist is reunited with her family. Now, all that’s left is to reclaim the kingdom as their own. Honestly, the fight scenes alone may make it worth the watch, but if you want a plot with any real substance, you might want to give this one a miss. Predictable and mind-numbingly repetitive, The Princess is tolerable at best. If you want a film to pop on as you scroll on your phone, this might be the perfect choice for you.
Did you know? Joey King has shaved her head for three different film roles in the past.
The Princess is out now on Disney+
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