"Tuck. Bruv. Man got absolutely spangled last night. Yeah. Just on me way to meet our Mazza now."
Woah! They Made it From Croatia!
If you’ve been reading our rag as thoroughly as you should have, then you’ll remember we interviewed with Sam and Chris Ogrizovic about their proposed trek from Croatia to Nottingham in honour of their late grandfather. We’re proud as punch to announce that the lads have made it without a hair harmed, all thanks to the kindness and hospitality of those they met on the way. They’ve even been reunited with long lost family. How’s that for feel good factor?
Notts County Ladies Play Dutteh Tactics
Tut tut tut. But top marks for effort, we have to say. The naughty boggers on the Notts County Ladies team pulled a sly one. During a free kick against Arsenal Ladies, two team members appeared to have a right old slanging match at each other, so the opposing team were distracted, and another Magpie took the shot. They scored, and showed no remorse. Do what you gotta do, ladies.
Well Tasteh
In these desperate times of austerity, it is important that we come together to support those struggling to provide for themselves. Dunkirk and Lenton Partnership are doing just that with their Tasty Tuesdays scheme, which offers a free, home cooked meal for all who need it. They are situated in Thomas Helwy’s Baptist church, and visitors are welcome anytime after 5pm for a hot drink and a chat. Good on ‘em.
"Oh my days, is it though?"
Snake in the Grass
We’re sure the coppers get called for a whole manner of things in this city. But things took a turn for the tropical when they were called to Alfreton Road last month. Somehow, a snake had managed to escape from the safety of his cage, and was painting the town red as he slithered down the middle of the road. Police arrived to ensure no harm came to the animal, and the owner collected the slippery bogger as soon as they realised he was missing.
GIANT WATER SLIDE IN NOTTS, YOU WHAT
All our childhood dreams have come true. A 1,000ft water slide is coming to Nottingham, complete with soap suds, joy, laughter and delight for all Hood Town civilians who love a good skid on a thin sheet of plastic. Apparently, it will be arriving in our city in August, but the venue will be kept hush hush until then. Let’s hope we get to slide down Mansfield Road in a blaze of soapy glory.
Happy Birthdeh, Edna
A marvellous Forest Road lady, Edna, turned 104 last month, and to celebrate, the council team who bring her ‘Meals At Home’ will be presenting her with a bouquet of flowers. Hopefully 104 diamond-encrusted red roses. She will be spending the day with her family, including her-86-year old daughter, June. Good genes in that family, clearly.
Froch to Retire?
The man of the minute has taken a fall from grace, losing his WBA super-middleweight champion belt after he refused to defend his title. We’ve heard rumours that he’s preparing to retire as well, casting a big, grey cloud over Nottingham’s boxing future. Wah. Then again, we’ve seen a fair few decent swings in Lloyds of a Friday night. We’ll have a new champ before we know it, but they’ll have some bleddy big boxing boots to fill.
"Fam, that is deep still."
Dolly Parton Says Ay Up Me Duck
We’ve got loads of celebs knocking on our doors and doing poor impressions of our accent. We’ve had Angie Jolie, and now Dolly Parton is giving it a go in aid of getting more Nottingham youths to read books. Good on her. She’s workin’ nine to five to encourage the kiddies to pick up the pages through her Dollywood Foundation charity partnership with Nottingham libraries. Sort them sprogs out, Doll.
SaSH
There’s food aplenty in our city, and we’re right in the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate than ourselves. The Jewish and Muslim community in our city have united through the Jewish Liberal Synagogue and the non-profit Muslim organisation, Himmah, to provide weekly hot meals for the city’s most needy. The Salaam Shalom Kitchen - or SaSH for short - will open in Hyson Green’s Bridge Centre.
Nepal Earthquake
It is with great sadness that we can confirm that former University of Nottingham student Matt Carapiet died as a result of the Nepalese earthquake. Matt, a student of architecture, was enjoying a gap year, trekking in the Langtang Valley when the earthquake struck, killing more than 8,000 in its wake.
Farage’s Salty Tears
Stuff like this makes us happy to be from Nottingham. Them cheeky chappies from indie band D.I.D have been trying to make a quick buck by selling a jar of Nigel Farage’s tears on eBay. Before they removed the item, they’d racked bids of up to £60,000.
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