5 Things to Do in Nottingham This Weekend

Everyone’s favourite ex-fruit and veg warehouse turned music venue is throwing its last bash of the year, and we’ve got no doubt it’s gonna be mental. As always, there’ll be signature punches and all the mince pies you can chomp yer gob on, with a loada musical goodness to enjoy. Tekin to the stage will be; London trio Lost in the Riots; instrumental legends Chiyoda Ku; the ‘eclectic noise’ of Memory of Elephants; northern rockers Cattle; and post rockers from South Wales, Excuses. Blimey. It’s almost too good to be true. We reckon it’s gonna go off.
Friday 15 December, 7pm-11pm, free, JT Soar, event link

Acoustic fiends Under the Tree are bringing us the ultimate chill-vibes with a festive edition of their event. They’ll be teking over Rough Trade armed with Whiskey, mistletoe and the finest new musicians to give you a right good time and make you feel all warm and jolly inside. Tunes will be provided by the likes of Painting Box, Laurie Illingworth, Jordon the Ego, Alice Short and Pretty Baps (who aren’t from Mansfield… promise). As always, it’s a free event, so there’s no excuse not to turn up and spread some festive cheer in the best Christmas jumper you own. Go on, off yer go.
Friday 15 December, 7pm, free, Rough Trade, event link

We’re telling yer, Sneinton Market is the place to BE. Not just because of the legendary GB cafe; not just because of the delights that await you in Murat International Food Centre; and not just because it’s where you can find us lot at the ‘Lion. It’s the place to be ‘cus there’s great events poppin’ off down here every week. This time, it’s the turn of Steampunk’s Christmas Market; a celebration of Chrimbo like none we’ve seen before. Come and experience Victorian Science Fiction brought to life and browse the selection of handmade gifts, clothes and what-not. There’ll be plenty of meat and veggie food to peruse and booze to wash it dahn with, and they’ve really gone all out with the entertainment. Hoop stepping, poetry, belly dancing and snake charming? Sounds like a full on Christmas carnival. See you there.
Saturday 16 December, 11am-3pm, free, Sneinton Market, event link  

At Christmas time, Saturdays in the city centre can be absolutely diabolical. Everywhere you wanna go, everyone else is going too. You spend hours traipsing round department stores looking for something, anything, to buy your estranged Uncle Geoff, and trying to carry four rolls of wrapping paper alongside your Boots gift sets never gets any easier. Pop your head in to see our Debbie Bryan for a bitta respite. She’ll be joined by poets and storytellers alike, who’ll soothe your stressed-out soul with their seasonal tales. You’re promised plenty of tea and cake to see you right, plus a free mince pie when you get there.
Saturday 16 December, 5.30pm, £6, Debbie Bryan, event link

Look, we get it. Not all of you are Christmas crazy. This one’s for all you horror lovers that just can’t let go of the Halloween spooks. Join storyteller and playwright Marty Ross for a creepy Christmas tale which will send shivers up your spine and keep you up at night. The story follows a young homeless woman in Victorian Glasgow, who accepts the offer of a kind minister to enter his grand house in the rural edge of the citeh. But all is not what it seems, and the ghosts of Christmas past are looking to cause some trouble. Now we’ve gotta warn yer… this ain’t a laid back, cosy tale-telling kinda affair… our Marty is known for his ability to scare the pants off even the manliest of men with his theatrical deliverance.
Sunday 17 December, 7.30pm-9.45pm, £8-£10, Chilwell Arts Theatre, event link